The above title is not some all inspiring metaphor about how I realized how to achieve perfect nirvana. Today, I literally went flying through the air.
Today was my school's Fall Frenzy, which is where they bring a ton of cool blow-up structures for us college kids to play in. There was an epic water slide, a water tag, a obstacle course you could race a friend in, and that weird game where you have bungie cords attached to you and you try to run farther then your opponent without getting flung backwards (Which totally did not happened to me. Several times)
However, the coolest attraction by far was the reverse skydiving machine. Yes my friends, reverse skydiving.
To prepare for this amazing experience, you had to surrender your cell phone, jewelry, loose change and any liability the company might have should you fly out of the machine and break your neck. No big deal.
After signing away your life, you had to put on a special suit that looked like Superman's costume (I'm not making this up). You were then given special goggles, ear plugs (The fan that makes you fly was LOUD), and a quick, five minute instruction on how not to die on this ride. So far so good.
Finally, you where ready for the machine. Before they turned the fan on, you had to climb up on this huge bouncy thing that had ropes attached to it so you didn't fly off. Then they turned the fan on.
One of the skydiving instructors then jumped right into the middle of the fan's air path and flew about twenty feet up into the air. He just floated there like a pro, doing a few flips and turns while in the air. He then gently floated back to the ground.
Then it was my turn.
After putting myself into the appropriate position (which frankly, made me look like a awkward Egyptian hieroglyphic), the instructors grabbed hold of my superman suit and flung me into the air.
At this point in the story, I hoped that I could tell you that I accomplished this feat with grace and excellence, reveling in the feeling of actually flying. That was not the case.
As I flew, though the feeling was exhilarating, two things happened.
First, it suddenly became difficult for me to breath.
And second, some of my spit started flying onto my face. Look at me being all graceful.
So as I flew there in the perfect flying position, gasping for air and feeling the stickiness on my face, my wonderful roommate Julia started busting up laughing at my awkwardness.
Eventually, it was over. The instructors who had held me the entire time flung me back onto the bouncy thing, and I could breath normally again. Julia was still laughing at me.
It was all good though. When Julia went, her goggles flew off her face.